Allen,
A few quick questions.
Are you always measuring the forestay tension with the backstay off? If not this can radically change the forestay tension.
When you measure with the same instrument in the same place on the wire do you get the same or different measurments? Moving the gague can induce different results, and if the gague is reading differently on different measurements then it isn't a calibration problem it is a repeatability one.
What points of sail does this guy beat you on, all the way around the race course or just upwind or downwind?
Is your pre-bend and rig placement right? Either of these can alter the headstay tension if you set it initially by length.
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